Member-only story
How Recurrent Nightmares Gave Me An Epiphany About My Biggest Fear
Tackling the fear of being trapped
I usually don’t talk or write about my dreams. It’s not because I don’t want to, but because I don’t remember them. But the other night, I had a nightmare that I remember somewhat vividly. It was so vivid that I knew I had to write it down so I wouldn’t forget what happened ten minutes later.
I got roped into some sort of mafia. I was a reluctant entrant, only getting in through someone I knew pressuring me, knowing the consequences of not being able to get out when I got in, but not being able to resist the pressure. I wasn’t motivated by the money or status, but just fear of exclusion and the fear of missing out.
Once I was in, people kept dying after perceived betrayals to the mob. I kept trying to get out and leave, but I couldn’t. We sat in some sort of big cafeteria and Hogwarts-like mess hall, where people were dropping like flies after the mafia suspected them of some slight, killing them. I had to witness senseless execution after senseless execution. This loop continued, seemingly all night, with people I had built relationships with and liked no longer being with the world.
I woke up. I didn’t remember all the details, but I do remember the feeling — like the world was extremely unfair…
